Relationships and Love: Search results for Marriage Help

12 Golden Rule To A Happy And Long Lasting Marriage/Dating

<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"> <img src="http://static.yourtango.com/cdn/farfuture/KAo2PPwFWDG0Fwq7dQMNqrkMNprh4Fmm6mivRRQb9CA/mtime:1427941577/sites/default/files/styles/listing_big/public/image_feature/golden.jpg?itok=xae17eRc" /><br /> <br /> <div class="field-value value-bold summary dek no-label" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; clear: both; font-family: 'Open Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 22.399999618530273px; margin-bottom: 10px;"> <div class="field field-name-field-daily-dish-feature-summar field-type-text-long field-label-above" style="box-sizing: border-box;"> <div class="field-items" style="box-sizing: border-box;"> <div class="field-item even" style="box-sizing: border-box;"> Fairy-tale love is hard to find. Here are some tips for keeping your relationship healthy and happy.</div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="field-value body no-label" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #333333; font-family: 'Open Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 22.399999618530273px; margin-bottom: 10px;"> <div style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 10px;"> One of the most common questions we hear is, "<em style="box-sizing: border-box;">How do we make our relationship work?</em>" The answers are complicated, varied, and after a while, start to sound like muddled platitudes. But these commonplace sayings get repeated because <em style="box-sizing: border-box;">they work</em>. With this in mind, we pulled together 12 cliches that, in fact, reveal simple, tried-and-true advice for having a healthy, happy relationship. Read on and let us know what you think:</div> <div style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 10px;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">1. Mind your manners.</strong> "Please," "thank you" and "you're welcome," can go a long way in helping your partner remember that you respect and love him and don't take him for granted.</div> <div style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 10px;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">2. Variety is the spice of life.</strong> Studies have shown that dullness can lead to dissatisfaction with a relationship. Trying something new can be as simple as visiting an unfamiliar restaurant or as grand as a backpacking trip through Sri Lanka. Discoveries you make together will keep you feeling close. </div> <div style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 10px;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">3. The couple that plays together, stays together.</strong> Find a sport or hobby that you both love (no, watching TV doesn't count) and make it a priority in your relationship. Camping, biking, building model trains. .. whatever it is, find something you enjoy doing together.</div> <div style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 10px;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">4. Fight right.</strong> In order to have productive arguments, keep these rules in mind: Don't call your spouse names. When things get really tough, take a break from the argument. Let the other person finish his/her sentences. Don't initiate a discussion when you're angry.</div> <div style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 10px;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">5. I'll scratch your back if you scratch mine.</strong> No one likes demands (unless you're in a BDSM role play) but everyone can appreciate a compromise. If you want your lover to do something and you're not sure he'll be agreeable, the quickest way to avoid a confrontation is to sweeten the deal. For example: "Sure, I'll watch Monday Night Football if you take me to see the next movie of my choice."</div> <div style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 10px;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">6. Two heads are better than one.</strong> Being in a relationship basically means you've made a merger; you've not only joined assets but inherited the other's problems as well. Rather than looking at his problems as merely his own, tackle them together. For example, if he's gaining weight, rather than pushing him to diet on his own, enroll in an exercise kegiatan together.</div> <div style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 10px;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">7. Distance makes the heart grow fonder.</strong> Maintain your own friendships and occasionally have a night out without your significant other. Doing things without your s.o. not only makes you miss him or her, it also keeps you sane. And in case the relationship doesn't work out, you'll still have your friends.</div> <div style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 10px;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">8. Sound it out.</strong> It other words: communicate! Talking out the tough subjects — money, religion, fidelity, raising kids —will not be the most fun you've had, but it'll be valuable.</div> <div style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 10px;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">9. Laughter is the best medicine.</strong> Learn to laugh at yourself and at silly mistakes. If he throws your $300 cashmere sweater in the dryer, laughing it off is better than getting angry in the long run. It's just a $300 cashmere sweater, not the end of the world.</div> <div style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 10px;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">10. Keep your eyes on the prize. </strong>Yes, he forgot your co-worker's name for the tenth time, but it probably doesn't mean he doesn't care about you. If you keep your perspective fixed on the goal — to be in a happy, functioning partnership — you're less likely to get tangled up in every minor annoyance. Remember, you both want the same thing.</div> <div style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 10px;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">11. Quitters never win.</strong> Find a ritual and keep it alive, no matter what. Whether it's always kissing each other good night, renewing your wedding vows every year, sleeping in as late as you want once a month or committing to having sex once a week, pick something that makes you both feel good and stick to it, even when you're tempted to skip.</div> <div style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 10px;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">12. When the going gets tough, the tough get going ... to therapy.</strong> Studies show that couples who seek counseling during rocky periods are more successful in resolving their issues than those who don't. Whether its from a religious figure, counselor or mental health professional, getting an expert to help sort out strife is as wise as forgoing self-installation and hiring a plumber to put in a new sink.</div> </div> </div>

12 Golden Rule To A Happy And Long Lasting Marriage/Dating

Fairy-tale love is hard to find. Here are some tips for keeping your relationship healthy and happy. One of the most common que...

Trust: A Critical Component of Sexual Intimacy in Committed Relationships

<header class="article-header" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #565656; font-family: Signika, "Helvetica Neue", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"><h1 class="entry-title single-title" itemprop="headline" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-family: Sanchez, Georgia, Cambria, "Times New Roman", Times, serif; font-size: 1.5em; font-weight: 400; line-height: 1.333em; margin: 0.67em 0px; text-rendering: optimizeLegibility;">
Trust: A Critical Component of Sexual Intimacy in Committed Relationships</h1>
<div class="single-featured-image" style="box-sizing: border-box;">
<img alt="" class="attachment-gz-thumb-750 size-gz-thumb-750 wp-post-image" height="500" itemprop="image" sizes="(max-width: 750px) 100vw, 750px" src="https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/Fotolia_65349056_S-750x500.jpg" srcset="https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/Fotolia_65349056_S-750x500.jpg 750w, https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/Fotolia_65349056_S-768x512.jpg 768w, https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/Fotolia_65349056_S-300x200.jpg 300w, https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/Fotolia_65349056_S-350x233.jpg 350w, https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/Fotolia_65349056_S.jpg 849w" style="border: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; height: auto; max-width: 100%;" width="750" /></div>
</header><section class="entry-content clearfix" itemprop="articleBody" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #565656; font-family: Signika, "Helvetica Neue", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; zoom: 1;"><div style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.6em; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-top: 1em; text-align: center;">
<strong style="box-sizing: border-box;"><em style="box-sizing: border-box;">Richard Nicastro, PhD, examines how the sexual intimacy stakes rise when you fall in love.  He highlights the conditions that either encourage or discourage trust in a committed relationship.</em></strong></div>
<div style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.6em; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-top: 1em;">
When love becomes part of the relationship landscape, when the other starts to <i style="box-sizing: border-box;">matter</i> to you, then how they respond takes on a heightened importance. And once love is set into motion, the more you are moved to share and give of yourself to your partner, the more vulnerable you become. Now trust becomes increasingly important to the workings of your relationship.</div>
<div style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.6em; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-top: 1em;">
Trust isn’t just a concept couples must learn about—rather, it’s a subjective experience that must be repeatedly lived and <i style="box-sizing: border-box;">felt</i>.<i style="box-sizing: border-box;"> </i>When trust is experienced in this way, the relationship offers a secure space for the couple, a space that offers solace and opportunities for deeper sharing and connection. Once <i style="box-sizing: border-box;">mutually</i> established, trust can then quietly recede into the background of the relationship where it continues to support the couple, offering comfort and stability, allowing each person to take the risks necessary for meaningful emotional and sexual expression and connection.</div>
<div style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.6em; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-top: 1em;">
<strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">There are conditions that enhance or violate trust.</strong></div>
<h3 style="box-sizing: border-box; font-family: Sanchez, Georgia, Cambria, "Times New Roman", Times, serif; font-size: 1.125em; font-weight: 400; margin: 1em 0px; text-rendering: optimizeLegibility;">
</h3>
<div style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.6em; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-top: 1em;">
Trust requires certain relationship conditions in order to take hold, and when these conditions are violated, when the foundation of trust is shaken, anxieties and insecurities awaken. The intensity of your trust-insecurities may periodically intrude or they may blanket every aspect of your relationship. A lack of trust (or trust that is doubted/questioned) is emotionally disruptive to all involved, and for emotional and sexual intimacy to be (re)established, trust must first be established.</div>
<div style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.6em; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-top: 1em;">
<strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">Pro-trust Conditions</strong></div>
<ul style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.6em; margin: 1em 0px 1em 1.5em; padding: 0px 0px 0px 1.5em;">
<li style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.6em; margin-bottom: 0.5em;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 1em; line-height: 1.6em;">accepting / encouraging</span></li>
<li style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.6em; margin-bottom: 0.5em;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 1em; line-height: 1.6em;">sensitive / concerned</span></li>
<li style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.6em; margin-bottom: 0.5em;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 1em; line-height: 1.6em;">emotionally open</span></li>
<li style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.6em; margin-bottom: 0.5em;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 1em; line-height: 1.6em;">responsive / engaged</span></li>
<li style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.6em; margin-bottom: 0.5em;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 1em; line-height: 1.6em;">committed / reliable</span></li>
</ul>
<div style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.6em; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-top: 1em;">
<strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">Anti-trust Conditions</strong></div>
<ul style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.6em; margin: 1em 0px 1em 1.5em; padding: 0px 0px 0px 1.5em;">
<li style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.6em; margin-bottom: 0.5em;">critical / judgmental</li>
<li style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.6em; margin-bottom: 0.5em;">aloof / indifferent</li>
<li style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.6em; margin-bottom: 0.5em;">defensive / closed-off</li>
<li style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.6em; margin-bottom: 0.5em;">unresponsive / detached</li>
<li style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.6em; margin-bottom: 0.5em;">erratic / unpredictable<span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 1em; line-height: 1.6em;"> </span><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 1em; line-height: 1.6em;">            </span></li>
</ul>
<div style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.6em; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-top: 1em;">
These behaviors (both pro- and anti-trust) take on particular significance when they come from the person you love and care for. The loved spouse/partner has particular power and influence over you—the power to help you feel secure and connected as well as intensely insecure and anxious. When trust conditions are violated, couples often shift from a secure to an insecure-anxious way of relating (even when anger predominates, the anger is often fueled by undercurrents of anxiety about losing the other).</div>
<div style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.6em; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-top: 1em; text-align: center;">
<em style="box-sizing: border-box;">“Having sex with someone I didn’t really know or care about was easy. It’s when I fell in love that sex became amazing and dangerous at the same time. All of a sudden, trust and the potential for betrayal became relevant.”</em>~Eric, 33 years old</div>
<div style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.6em; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-top: 1em;">
During sex, the stakes are always elevated because sexual intimacy is inherently risky emotional business—that is, the level of emotional vulnerability evoked with someone you deeply care about presents both the potential for intimate sharing and authentic contact and, when things go awry, emotional wounding and withdrawal. And during these heightened-vulnerability circumstances, your best intentions may not be enough to circumvent painful misunderstandings.</div>
<div style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.6em; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-top: 1em;">
Having conversations about the conditions you and your partner each need to enhance trust is important in making these conditions <i style="box-sizing: border-box;">explicitly</i> known to you both. Using the above list of pro- and anti-trust conditions can be a good starting point to jump-start such a discussion. Remember, when trust is solidified, the couple enters an orbit of emotional security surrounding the marriage/relationship, a security that allows for the potential of deeper emotional sharing and sexual exploration and expression.</div>
</section>

Trust: A Critical Component of Sexual Intimacy in Committed Relationships

Trust: A Critical Component of Sexual Intimacy in Committed Relationships Richard Nicastro, PhD, examines how the sexual intimacy stake...

Five Ways On How Better Communication Can Prevent Divorce

<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"> <br /> <h1 class="post-title" style="background-color: white; border: 0px; clear: left; color: #444444; float: left; font-family: Titillium, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 38px; font-stretch: inherit; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: -1px; line-height: 1.3em; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; margin-top: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline; word-wrap: break-word;"> <img height="266" src="http://www.blackloveandmarriage.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/old_black_couple-e1315319695679.jpg" width="400" /></h1> <br /> <h1 class="post-title" style="background-color: white; border: 0px; color: #444444; font-family: Titillium, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 38px; font-stretch: inherit; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: -1px; line-height: 1.3em; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline; word-wrap: break-word;"> <div style="border: 0px; color: #666666; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: inherit; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 28.7999992370605px; margin-bottom: 1em; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> When asked about making relationships last just about everyone will tell you the same thing: communication is key! It is advice that is as useful as it is vague. It offers no practical steps you can take, and fails to acknowledge that communication takes many forms, and they aren’t all good for your relationship. Here are some tried and tested methods for keeping the communication in your relationship productive and open.</div> <div style="border: 0px; color: #666666; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: inherit; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 28.7999992370605px; margin-bottom: 1em; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit; font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: 600; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Honesty is (usually) the best policy</span></div> <div style="border: 0px; color: #666666; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: inherit; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 28.7999992370605px; margin-bottom: 1em; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> Being honest about how you feel and what you need is the most important and effective thing you can do to preserve your marriage. It can be difficult to tell someone you love that you’re unhappy or unfulfilled, but if you don’t tell them, they’ll never know. Be clear and open about what you feel is missing, or what needs to change. Your spouse loves you and wants you to be happy. If you tell them what you need, they will almost certainly want to help you find it.</div> <div style="border: 0px; color: #666666; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: inherit; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 28.7999992370605px; margin-bottom: 1em; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit; font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: 600; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Not everything you think needs to be said</span></div> <div style="border: 0px; color: #666666; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: inherit; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 28.7999992370605px; margin-bottom: 1em; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> Sometimes sharing close quarters with someone you love means finding them frustrating and irritating. Sometimes even the sound of them breathing can make you crazy. This doesn’t mean that you don’t love them anymore, and it definitely doesn’t mean that there is something wrong with the way they breathe. Letting thoughts like those out is destructive and hurtful, and accomplishes absolutely nothing. Before criticizing your partner, try to think about how you would feel if they made the same complaint about you, then try to drop it.</div> <div style="border: 0px; color: #666666; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: inherit; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 28.7999992370605px; margin-bottom: 1em; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit; font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: 600; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Don’t bottle it up…</span></div> <div style="border: 0px; color: #666666; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: inherit; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 28.7999992370605px; margin-bottom: 1em; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> The first piece of relationship advice my mother ever gave me was “don’t let it fester.” She said she and my father didn’t have their first fight until they had been together for 5 years, and boy was it a doozy. Even if your spouse does something totally inappropriate or cruel, once you’ve held onto your anger for long enough, you’ve given up the high ground. If an issue isn’t important enough to be addressed in a timely manner, it isn’t important enough to be used at a later date either.</div> <div style="border: 0px; color: #666666; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: inherit; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 28.7999992370605px; margin-bottom: 1em; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit; font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: 600; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">But bottle it up a little</span></div> <div style="border: 0px; color: #666666; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: inherit; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 28.7999992370605px; margin-bottom: 1em; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> There is a difference between passive-aggressively holding onto past mistakes, and thinking calmly about a perkara before discussing it. When you are hurt, or angry, or frustrated, your ability to talk reasonably and come up with a solution is going to suffer. Sometimes it is a good idea to wait a little while and let the most extreme emotional responses fade before broaching a subject. This will allow you to come at it with some perspective, and to say calmly to your partner, “it bothers me when you do this, for this reason.” No yelling, no accusations, just a simple conversation about ways to make living together easier for both of you.</div> <div style="border: 0px; color: #666666; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: inherit; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 28.7999992370605px; margin-bottom: 1em; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit; font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: 600; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Find new ways to discuss difficult issues</span></div> <div style="border: 0px; color: #666666; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: inherit; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 28.7999992370605px; margin-bottom: 1em; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> For some people confrontation is more than just difficult. My sister suffers from actual panic attacks during difficult encounters, which makes those hard conversations even more of a challenge. She and her husband work online from two separate offices in the same house, and occasionally they will discuss touchy subjects via online chat. It allows her to distance herself from the stress of the conversation without sacrificing her own needs. There are other advantages to the written word; it gives you an opportunity to reconsider what you wish to say before it is too late, and it forces you to abandon sarcasm, the great American crutch. Since your tone can’t indicate whether or not you are serious, you should be writing only what you mean.</div> </h1> </div>

Five Ways On How Better Communication Can Prevent Divorce

When asked about making relationships last just about everyone will tell you the same thing: communication is key! It is advice that ...

Relationships and Love

12 Golden Rule To A Happy And Long Lasting Marriage/Dating

Trust: A Critical Component of Sexual Intimacy in Committed Relationships

Five Ways On How Better Communication Can Prevent Divorce

Popular Posts

Labels

Blog Archive