5 Tips For Starting A New Relationship

<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"> <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"> <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5L3oeBKplVY1XHMT-1w-Qa33P7UbeAbQ74LTNenRV4mEmds7k-AeZR0u3PZtJzmE_PGU1GxEnQi1KOr5qC07xBGn22vB3b3JdHkXGJyq00C0mStzWUfXhak1ltQ7wGQ8kB6TwiZpH0Kk/s1600/5-tips-start-relationship-1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5L3oeBKplVY1XHMT-1w-Qa33P7UbeAbQ74LTNenRV4mEmds7k-AeZR0u3PZtJzmE_PGU1GxEnQi1KOr5qC07xBGn22vB3b3JdHkXGJyq00C0mStzWUfXhak1ltQ7wGQ8kB6TwiZpH0Kk/s400/5-tips-start-relationship-1.jpg" width="400" /></a></div> <div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: arial, helvetica, clean, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 20px; padding: 0px; width: auto;"> <br /></div> <div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: arial, helvetica, clean, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 20px; padding: 0px; width: auto;"> Beginning a relationship can feel a lot like entering uncharted waters (no matter how many times you've done it). There's no map. Every girl you date has unique personality traits, needs and desires, so you can't necessarily approach each relationship the same cookie-cutter way.</div> <div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: arial, helvetica, clean, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 20px; margin-top: 15px; padding: 0px; width: auto;"> Perhaps you're ready to take things to the next level with someone you've been dating. Or maybe you want to be with a friend you've developed feelings for over time. Regardless of how you've arrived at this crossroads, five practical tips can help you get off to a good start and navigate your path as a couple. These tips aren't tricks, rules or games. Leave that to dating -- you know, that casual, noncommitted time spent together doing things like going to movies or out to dinner. The approaches we'll discuss here are fitting if you want to set yourself up for something much more: a relationship that's about an emotional, committed connection.</div> <h2 style="background-color: white; color: #333333; display: table-cell; font-family: arial, helvetica, clean, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; height: 46px; line-height: 19.695999145507813px; margin: 15px 0px 0px; padding: 0px 0px 0px 10px; vertical-align: middle; width: 380px;"> 5. Get Clear on What You Want</h2> <div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: arial, helvetica, clean, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 20px; margin-top: 15px; padding: 0px; width: auto;"> First things first. Identify what you want out of a relationship. Think big picture here. Maybe you want to see multiple girls at one time to play the dating circuit. Or maybe you want to fall in love and be in a monogamous relationship. Whether casual or committed, relationships are much easier (and more fun) if you know what you want out of the experience before you start one.</div> <div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: arial, helvetica, clean, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 20px; margin-top: 15px; padding: 0px; width: auto;"> Our brains are wired to experience lust, romantic love and attachment (a sense of calm and security for a long-term partner), according to Dr. Helen Fisher, an anthropologist and expert on romantic love. She says it's possible to experience these three distinct types of love simultaneously -- even for three people at the same time. Which ones are most important to you? If you're after all three in one person, great! Just get clear on what you desire so you can manifest it.</div> <div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: arial, helvetica, clean, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 20px; margin-top: 15px; padding: 0px; width: auto;"> Actualize your ideal relationship by listing qualities you’re looking for in a partner. Religious values, intelligence, hair color: Whatever you care about, put it on your wish list. Next, whittle it down to qualities you can’t live without. You might have a list of 30 preferences, but only seven non-negotiables. Consider only dating people who make your short list. Why? It’s simple: You’re more likely to find the relationship you want.</div> <div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: arial, helvetica, clean, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 20px; margin-top: 15px; padding: 0px; width: auto;"> When you find your non-negotiables in one person, you've got something special! That kind of connection doesn't happen every day, so protect and cherish what you have.</div> <h2 style="background-color: white; color: #333333; display: table-cell; font-family: arial, helvetica, clean, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; height: 46px; line-height: 19.695999145507813px; margin: 15px 0px 0px; padding: 0px 0px 0px 10px; vertical-align: middle; width: 380px;"> 4. Share Your Intentions With Her</h2> <div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: arial, helvetica, clean, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 20px; padding: 0px; width: auto;"> Share your intentions with the girl you're dating. Do it relatively early on, not six months into seeing her. This means explaining your expectations and hopes not only for your own future, but for your future together. Do you hope the relationship grows into something long-term, or do you plan tosplit up when you move across the country for school soon?</div> <div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: arial, helvetica, clean, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 20px; margin-top: 15px; padding: 0px; width: auto;"> Talk instead of making assumptions. Different activities and gestures mean different things to different people. Meeting each other's parents or getting physically intimate automatically equates to a monogamous relationship to some people, but it might mean casual dating to others. Remember, sharing intentions doesn't mean you have to know specifics like whether this girl is right for you now or is the one you want to marry down the road. It's about disclosing the direction you're going, not necessarily the destination. Where are you headed? Answering this question helps avoid miscommunications, hurt feelings, lost time and bruised egos.</div> <h2 style="background-color: white; color: #333333; display: table-cell; font-family: arial, helvetica, clean, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; height: 46px; line-height: 19.695999145507813px; margin: 15px 0px 0px; padding: 0px 0px 0px 10px; vertical-align: middle; width: 380px;"> 3. Be Your (Best) Self</h2> <div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: arial, helvetica, clean, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 20px; padding: 0px; width: auto;"> You should be able to be yourself around your special lady friend. What are you normally like when it comes to things like hobbies, humor, spirituality or goals? Do you change when you're around her? Hopefully, not much. Sure, sometimes change can be a good thing if she helps you evolve and mature. But in general, if you behave in ways that are inconsistent with who you really are to satisfy, impress or appease her, you might be dating the wrong person.</div> <div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: arial, helvetica, clean, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 20px; margin-top: 15px; padding: 0px; width: auto;"> Real affection is when someone is into you for you. It comes from a place of acceptance, not a place of deception where a woman has been duped by an act you've put on.</div> <div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: arial, helvetica, clean, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 20px; margin-top: 15px; padding: 0px; width: auto;"> Gravitate toward girls who celebrate and encourage the authentic you, not the ones who press you to change for them rather than for yourself.</div> <h2 style="background-color: white; color: #333333; display: table-cell; font-family: arial, helvetica, clean, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; height: 46px; line-height: 19.695999145507813px; margin: 15px 0px 0px; padding: 0px 0px 0px 10px; vertical-align: middle; width: 380px;"> 2. Show Her You Get Her</h2> <div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: arial, helvetica, clean, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 20px; margin-top: 15px; padding: 0px; width: auto;"> People mostly feel (and give) affection in one of five main ways, according to Dr. Gary Chapman, author of best-selling book "The Five Love Languages." Chapman defines the five love languages as physical touch, words of affirmation, acts of service, quality time and gifts. He advocates <a href="http://health.howstuffworks.com/relationships/tips/5-communication-tips-for-romantic-relationships.htm" style="color: #005288; text-decoration: none;">communicating</a> your feelings for your partner using the language she most identifies with. You can tell her "<a href="http://health.howstuffworks.com/relationships/advice/first-to-say-i-love-you.htm" style="color: #005288; text-decoration: none;">I love you</a>," "You're so beautiful" or other words of affirmation 100 times a day, but if her language is physical touch, she's not going to feel the magnitude of what you're trying to communicate. A hug and kiss when she walks in the door or a foot rub while watching a movie probably will go further in making her feel cherished and close to you. (And don't forget to let her know your own love language.)</div> <div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: arial, helvetica, clean, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 20px; margin-top: 15px; padding: 0px; width: auto;"> A big part of a successful relationship is to show your girl you get her. For example, don't keep giving her roses if she's made numerous comments that wildflowers are her favorite. If spending quality time together is big for her, say yes to her invitations to go on walks, watch the sunset or turn off the TV at dinner and talk instead. If you don't, no matter what you do, she probably won't feel very loved or understood.</div> <h2 style="background-color: white; color: #333333; display: table-cell; font-family: arial, helvetica, clean, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; height: 46px; line-height: 19.695999145507813px; margin: 15px 0px 0px; padding: 0px 0px 0px 10px; vertical-align: middle; width: 380px;"> 1. Mind Your Money</h2> <div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: arial, helvetica, clean, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 20px; padding: 0px; width: auto;"> If you want to date one or more people at a time just to have fun, carefree experiences, knock yourself out. Spend whatever you've budgeted for the ladies. Have a great time!</div> <div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: arial, helvetica, clean, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 20px; margin-top: 15px; padding: 0px; width: auto;"> But if you're looking for an intimate relationship and perhaps something more long-term, let's assume you want to be with a woman who's with you for you -- not your money (or lack thereof). It's fairly easy to have a good time with almost anyone when you're doing fun things like dining at nice restaurants, attending swanky events or living the high life. Right?</div> <div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: arial, helvetica, clean, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 20px; margin-top: 15px; padding: 0px; width: auto;"> So, find out if you two have a close bond by doing free or cheap things together. If you're able to feel closeness and have a blast without spending a dime, what's holding you two together probably has more to do with your dynamic than you simply being a vehicle to fun times.</div> <h2 style="background-color: white; color: #333333; display: table-cell; font-family: arial, helvetica, clean, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; height: 46px; line-height: 19.695999145507813px; margin: 15px 0px 0px; padding: 0px 0px 0px 10px; vertical-align: middle; width: 380px;"> <br /><br /></h2> </div>

5 Tips For Starting A New Relationship

Beginning a relationship can feel a lot like entering uncharted waters (no matter how many times you've done it). There's no m...

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17 Must-Have Conversations with Your Child

<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"> <header class="article-header"><h1 class="entry-title single-title" itemprop="headline"> 17 Must-Have Conversations with Your Child</h1> <div class="single-featured-image"> <img alt="" class="attachment-gz-thumb-750 size-gz-thumb-750 wp-post-image" height="426" itemprop="image" src="https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/01/Fotolia_53954545_S-750x500.jpg" width="640" /></div> </header><section class="entry-content clearfix" itemprop="articleBody"><div style="text-align: center;"> <strong>Life coach, Mark Chernoff, breaks down some important life truths that can shape how children view themselves and their place in the world.  Parents, no matter how old your child (or adult child), it’s never too late to help them integrate these lessons.</strong></div> Our children grow up so fast.  Before we know it they’re out there somewhere in the real world, and we’re left hoping that we’ve done enough to prepare them for everything they’ll encounter.  Angel and I talk to course students and coaching clients on a regular basis – mothers and fathers alike – who share these sentiments.  They worry about their children.  They wonder if they’ve done a good enough job parenting up to this point.  And Angel and I totally get it too.  Oftentimes we feel the same way.  We’re concerned about our son Mac’s well-being and education, and we discuss it frequently, just like most parents.<br /> In fact, from what we’ve researched and studied, the well-being and education of their children is more important to most parents than just about anything else – health care, cost of living, public safety, and even their own well-being.  And believe it or not, most non-parents also say they’re concerned about the well-being and intellectual growth of society’s youth; this concern seems to cut cleanly across gender, ethnicity, age, income and political affiliation.  So the reality is, to a great extent, we all collectively care about our children.   And that’s a really beautiful thing when you think about it.<br /> Anyway, I awoke this morning thinking about all of this – especially the miraculous, life-changing responsibility of parenthood – and two related thoughts immediately crossed my mind:<br /> <ul> <li>Whoa!  Time flies.  How in the world did Angel and I suddenly become parents to a little boy that’s running all over the place and asking questions about everything under the sun?</li> <li>There are so many important truths I want to share with Mac… as soon as feasibly possible.</li> </ul> So I’m writing this post as a reminder to myself, and to all parents…<span id="more-4358"></span><br /> Here are 20 simple yet powerful truths you can add to your daily conversations with your child that will gradually change how they think about themselves and their place in the world, and ultimately transform how they live their life.  Please remember, also, that it’s never too late to discuss these truths – in most cases they are equally relevant to youngsters, adolescents, and adult children alike.<br /> <ol> <li><strong>Learning how to think is far more useful than learning what to think.</strong> – A big part of your life is a direct result of the decisions you make; if you don’t like your life for some reason, it’s time to start making changes and better decisions.  And the same is true for all of us, including our children.  It’s crucial that our children gradually grow to understand that THEY must learn to make good decisions for themselves, without us.  Parents can only guide by example and put their offspring on the right path, but the final forming of a person’s character and life story lies in their own hands.  You can walk beside your child most of the time, but not in their shoes.  And someday, when you’re not around, they’ll come to a fork in the road that forces them to think for themselves.  Which is why it’s important to teach your child how to think, not what to think.  (The remaining points in this article will help you do just that.)</li> <li><strong>Everything is hard before it’s easy, and we get stronger as we go.</strong> – One of the best things you can do for your child as they grow is to let go and allow them to do things for themselves, all<img alt="" class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-10408" height="200" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" src="http://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/12/Fotolia_93394019_S-300x200.jpg" srcset="https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/12/Fotolia_93394019_S-300x200.jpg 300w, https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/12/Fotolia_93394019_S-768x512.jpg 768w, https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/12/Fotolia_93394019_S-350x233.jpg 350w, https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/12/Fotolia_93394019_S-750x500.jpg 750w, https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/12/Fotolia_93394019_S.jpg 849w" width="300" />ow them to be strong and responsible, allow them the freedom to experience things on their own terms, allow them to take the bus or the train and learn from life firsthand – allow them to be better people, allow them to believe more in themselves and do more by themselves.  Journeying through life on your own two feet is a learning process – you become stronger as you go.  It’s like a little girl who struggles to find her way home from school without her parent’s help – doing it the first few times is daunting and scary, but in the long run she’s safer and better off having learned the way.</li> <li><strong>The biggest disappointments in life are often the result of misplaced expectations.</strong> – When we are really young our expectations are few, but as we age our expectations tend to balloon with each passing year.  The key is to help your child understand that tempering unrealistic expectations of how something “should be” can greatly reduce unnecessary stress and frustration.  With a positive attitude and an open mind, we often find that life isn’t necessarily any easier or harder than we thought it was going to be; it’s just that “the easy” and “the hard” aren’t exactly the way we had anticipated, and don’t always occur when we expect them to.  This isn’t a bad thing – it makes life interesting, if we’re willing to see it that way.</li> <li><strong>Worry is the cruelest enemy of personal growth.</strong> – Worrying does nothing but steal your joy and keep you very busy doing absolutely nothing at all.  When you spend time worrying, you’re simply using your imagination to create things you don’t want.  And, as every child knows deep down, there are much better ways to use an imagination.  Do your best to remind them of this.</li> <li><strong>Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference.</strong> – If you want to be effective in life, you can’t base your attitude on how things are.  Instead, you have to choose your attitude so it supports and expresses the way you wish to be.  It’s not about expecting the best to always happen, but instead accepting whatever happens and then making the very best of it.  Truly, most of our long-tern frustration and stress comes from the way we respond and react to circumstances, not the circumstances themselves.  Learn to adjust your attitude, and all that extra frustration and stress is gone.  Practice this in your own life, so your child can witness the results firsthand.</li> <li><strong>Reflecting on what we’re grateful for makes us happier and healthier.</strong> – In <em>1,000 Little Things Happy, Successful People Do Differently,</em> Angel and I discuss the powerful benefits of keeping a gratitude journal.  And the really good news is it works for children too.  In one celebrated example, Dr. Robert Emmons, of UC Davis, asked teenage students to keep a gratitude journal – over ten weeks, the young undergrads listed five things that had happened in the past week which they were grateful for.  The results were astoundingly powerful – the students who kept the gratitude journal were up to 25% happier, more optimistic about their future, and got sick less often during the controlled study.  They even got more exercise than usual.  The bottom line is that children who keep a gratitude journal are statistically happier, more optimistic, and healthier.  As soon as your child is old enough, help them start one.</li> <li><strong>The lifelong pursuit of happiness is about finding meaning.</strong> – Pursuing happiness is not <img alt="" class="alignright size-full wp-image-9811" height="266" sizes="(max-width: 400px) 100vw, 400px" src="http://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/07/Fotolia_37190292_S-e1494606571373.jpg" srcset="https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/07/Fotolia_37190292_S-e1494606571373.jpg 400w, https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/07/Fotolia_37190292_S-e1494606571373-300x200.jpg 300w, https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/07/Fotolia_37190292_S-e1494606571373-350x234.jpg 350w" width="400" />at all the same as feeling happy, which is a fleeting emotion dependent on momentary circumstances.  This is something that tends to confuse us when we’re young.  Happy moments feel great and are often fun-filled – if the sun is shining, by all means we should bask in it.  But happy moments always pass, because time passes.  The lifelong pursuit of happiness, on the other hand, is far more elusive; it’s not based on a particular momentary circumstance.  What you are really pursuing is meaning – living a meaningful life.  It starts with your “why.”  (Why are you doing what you’re doing every day?)  When your “why” has significance, you are living your life on your own terms, which makes the inevitable obstacles that arise on your path that much easier and more fulfilling to overcome.  In essence, you are putting forth effort and pushing forward because doing so brings meaning into your life.  (Do your best to help your child find their “why,” and let them know that it’s OK if it changes over time.)</li> <li><strong>The right journey is the destination.</strong> – The most prolific and beneficial experience is not in actually achieving something you want, but in seeking it.  It’s the journey towards an endless horizon that matters – goals that move forward with you as you chase them.  It’s all about meaningful pursuits – the “moving” – and what you learn along the way.  Truly, the most important reason for moving from one place to another is to see what’s in between.  In between is where passions are realized, love is found, strength is gained, and memories are made.  You can’t get any of that without firsthand living.  In other words, the right journey is the destination.  Remember this truth, live by it… set an example for your child.</li> <li><strong>The most effective way to move away from something you don’t want, is to move toward something you DO want.</strong> – “Don’t think about eating that chocolate donut!”  What are you thinking about now?  Eating that chocolate donut, right?  When we focus on not doing something, we end up thinking more about it.  The same philosophy holds true in all walks of life, regardless of our age.  By persistently trying to move away from what we don’t want, we are inadvertently forced to think about it so much that we end up carrying it’s weight along with us.  But if we instead choose to focus our energy on moving toward something we DO want, we naturally leave the negative weight behind as we move forward with our lives.</li> <li><strong>Actions always speak 100% louder than words.</strong> – Children have never been perfect at listening to their parents, but they have never failed to imitate them.  Keep this in mind.  Let your children watch you set an example every day in all that you do, and then reinforce your actions with verbal guidance.  Ultimately, all of us – young and old alike – need to remember that what we really want in life comes from what we really do in life.</li> <li><strong>The willingness to do hard things opens significant doors of opportunity.</strong> – One of the most important abilities you can help a child develop in life is being OK with some level of discomfort.  Because the best things are often hard to come by, and if you shy away from difficulty and discomfort, you’ll miss out on them.  Mastering a new skill is hard.  Building a business is hard.  Writing a book is hard.  A marriage is hard.  Parenting is hard.  Staying in shape is hard.  All are amazing and worth every bit of effort you can muster.  If you get good at doing hard things, you can do almost anything you put your mind to.</li> <li><strong>Uncertainty is inevitable and must be embraced to achieve anything worthwhile.</strong> – When we act with some level of uncertainty, this uncertainty often chases us out into the open where opportunity awaits.  Thus, learning to embrace uncertainty relatively early in life is a must.  Because if we need to know exactly how every little thing will turn out, we’ll avoid many life-changing projects, career moves, relationships, etc.  Starting a business, for example, could be a very worthwhile thing to do, but if you’re scared of uncertainty you’ll skip it.  Continually cowering in the face of uncertainty like this means you will never know anything for sure, and in many ways this unknowing will be worse than finding out your hunch was wrong.  For if you were wrong, you could make adjustments and carry on with your life without ever looking back and wondering what might have been.</li> <li><strong>Lack of effort holds more people back than intelligence ever could.</strong> – It doesn’t matter if you have a genius IQ and a PhD in Quantum Physics, you can’t change anything or make any sort of real-world progress without putting forth diligent effort.  There’s a huge difference between knowing how to do something and actually doing it.  Knowledge and intelligence are both useless to a person who’s unwilling to put in the effort and take action.  Remember this, and do your best to praise your child for their effort, not their intelligence.  When you praise your child’s efforts you are bringing attention to something they CAN control – the amount of time and energy they put into their work.  This is immensely important because it teaches them to persist, and that progress through hard work is possible.  They come to see themselves as “in control” of their success in life.  Conversely, emphasizing God-given intelligence takes progress out of your child’s control, and it provides no good formula for responding to failure.  In turn, your child may begin to think that innate intelligence is always going to be a missing element for them, and thus disregard the importance of their effort to learn and grow.</li> <li><strong>Not everything will go as planned, but we can still be prepared.</strong> – For every youngster that succeeds in doing exactly what they set out to do in the exact time frame they set out to do it in, there are dozens of others who start strong and get derailed.  Help your child understand that if this happens to them, it isn’t a bad thing.  Unexpected obstacles may come along to shift their perspective, to strengthen their resolve, or to change their direction for the better.  And the destination they fall in love with someday may not even exist now.  For example, just a few short years ago the esteemed career paths of working at Facebook and Snapchat didn’t exist.  Neither did the job of professional coach and writer at Marc and Angel Hack Life.  So if a child can’t plan out their future in its entirety, what should they do?  Focus a little less on the future and focus more on what they can do now that will benefit them no matter what the future brings.  Read inspiring books.  Write.  Learn and practice useful skills.  Build things.  Be adventurous and seek real-world experiences.  Help people.  Cultivate healthy relationships.  These efforts will assist in any future circumstances that come their way.</li> <li><strong>Incredible distance can be covered over time with tiny steps.</strong> – Most people fritter their free time away on things that don’t matter, like TV, video games, social media, etc.  A year of that and you have absolutely zero to show for it.  But if you painted every day, or practiced your web design skills, or wrot<img alt="" class="size-medium wp-image-10647 alignleft" height="200" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" src="http://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/05/Fotolia_142119393_XS-300x200.jpg" srcset="https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/05/Fotolia_142119393_XS-300x200.jpg 300w, https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/05/Fotolia_142119393_XS-350x234.jpg 350w, https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/05/Fotolia_142119393_XS.jpg 424w" width="300" />e on a blog, or updated and perfected a video channel on YouTube, or started building a side business/passion project, or spent more time networking with the right people… at the end of a year you’ll have built something interesting.  And you’ll have some great life experiences too – experiences you can point to and say, “I built that, and I learned this,” which, sadly, many people can’t do.  Also, it’s important to mention that although it may seem easier for younger people to do these things, it’s 100% possible for all of us to take tiny steps in the right direction, day in and day out, for the rest of our lives.</li> <li><strong>Goals don’t make positive changes happen, rituals do.</strong> – What’s the difference between goals and rituals?  As a parent, your goal is to be a great role model, while your ritual is the time and energy you commit to setting a great example for your child each day.  If you’re an entrepreneur, your goal is to grow a successful business, while your ritual is your daily work ethic combined with your management, marketing and sales processes.  If you’re a fiction writer, your goal is to write a novel, while your ritual is the writing schedule you follow each day.  Now think about this:  If you ignored your goals for a while and focused solely on your rituals, would you still get positive results?  For example, if you were trying to lose weight and you ignored your goal to lose 20 pounds, and instead focused only on eating healthy and exercising each day, would you still get results?  Yes, you would.  Gradually, you would get closer and closer to your goal without even thinking about it again.  The earlier we learn this in life, the longer we have to make our positive daily rituals work in our favor.  But it’s never too late either.  <em>(Angel and I build tiny, daily, life-changing rituals with our students in the “Goals and Growth” module of Getting Back to Happy.)</em></li> <li><strong>Trustworthiness is the foundation of progress.</strong> – The underlying key, for all of us, is to be trustworthy in our relationships.  When someone gives someone an employment or business opportunity, the biggest fear is that this person is not trustworthy – that they’ll slack off and try to cheat the system.  Someone who has established a positive reputation over the years will likely be more trusted, and more likely to be recommended.  So do you best to teach you child to be trustworthy by being honest, admitting mistakes and fixing them, and generally going above and beyond the call of duty in all personal and professional relationships.  When we adhere to this philosophy, we end up building a good reputation and people appreciate and endorse us more openly, which is the best way to get a job, a business investor, or another good friend.</li> </ol> </section></div>

17 Must-Have Conversations with Your Child

17 Must-Have Conversations with Your Child Life coach, Mark Chernoff, breaks down some important life truths that can shape how chil...

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5 Reasons You Need To Stop Comparing Yourself To His Ex

<div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: Avenir; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; text-align: left;"> <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh07tg3iaVzTzyvwakhkw2IzEBOangusKp0Yi6HQ61VUbYb_b924KUqFKpQlST6joul69QH8q8T37Ifz_OP5sSPrDZ1e3QhF7yJ4c6K_osoOQZX93p6O24EyielKfa9ifRRzZX0rlhaYow/s1600/how+to+stop+comparing+yourself+to+his+ex.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img alt=" stop comparing yourself to his ex girlfriend 5 Reasons You Need To Stop Comparing Yourself To His Ex" border="0" data-original-height="1500" data-original-width="735" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh07tg3iaVzTzyvwakhkw2IzEBOangusKp0Yi6HQ61VUbYb_b924KUqFKpQlST6joul69QH8q8T37Ifz_OP5sSPrDZ1e3QhF7yJ4c6K_osoOQZX93p6O24EyielKfa9ifRRzZX0rlhaYow/s1600/how+to+stop+comparing+yourself+to+his+ex.png" title="5 Reasons You Need To Stop Comparing Yourself To His Ex" width="312" /></a><span style="font-kerning: none;"><br /></span><br /> <span style="font-kerning: none;">So you're in a new relationship, everything is going well and you want to know a little more about your boyfriends past. Maybe he brings up that he was in a past relationship or you ask him if he's dated someone before. </span><br /> <span style="font-kerning: none;"><br /></span> <span style="font-kerning: none;">Before you know it, you see all your boyfriend's pictures popping up on Facebook of him with his ex as a happy couple, <b>and doubt starts to creep in.</b></span><br /> <span style="font-kerning: none;"><br /></span> <span style="font-kerning: none;">You start wanting to know more about her, what she was like, how and why the relationship ended and before you know it you find yourself comparing yourself to her and how your relationship is different now to when they were together.</span><br /> <span style="font-kerning: none;"><br /></span> <span style="font-kerning: none;">It's natural for anyone in this situation to compare themselves to an ex-partner but <b>it's very unhealthy for your relationship and yourself</b> if you keep comparing yourself to your boyfriends ex.</span></div> <div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: Avenir; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; text-align: left;"> <span style="font-kerning: none;"><br /></span></div> <div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: Avenir; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; text-align: left;"> <span style="color: #e06666; font-kerning: none;"><span style="color: #e06666;"><a href="https://justandmyguys.blogspot.com//search?q=15-signs-you-need-to-end-your-relationship"><span style="color: #e06666;">Read Next: 15 Signs You're Relationship Isn't Working</span></a></span></span><br /> <span style="color: #e06666; font-kerning: none;"><br /></span> <span style="color: #e06666; font-kerning: none;"><span style="color: black;">These are the reasons why you need to stop comparing yourself to your boyfriends ex.</span></span></div> <div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: Avenir; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; min-height: 25px; text-align: left;"> <span style="font-kerning: none;"></span><br /></div> <div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "Avenir Next Condensed"; font-size: 38px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; text-align: left;"> <span style="font-kerning: none;"><b>1. You're Making Yourself Insecure</b></span></div> <div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: Avenir; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; min-height: 25px; text-align: left;"> <span style="font-kerning: none;"></span><br /></div> <div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: Avenir; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; text-align: left;"> <span style="font-kerning: none;">Ok so maybe his ex-girlfriend is tall, skinny, pretty with long hair. That shouldn't matter because he's with <i>you</i> now, right? No. By comparing yourself to her you'll start to think she's better than you or she has a nicer figure or she is way more beautiful than you and you'll start to wonder why your boyfriend is even with you instead of her.</span></div> <div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: Avenir; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; min-height: 25px; text-align: left;"> <span style="font-kerning: none;"></span><br /></div> <div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: Avenir; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; text-align: left;"> <span style="font-kerning: none;">You have to realise that <b>your partner has chosen <i>you</i></b> and you are the person he wants to be with, not her. It's easy to compare yourself to other people but all it does is damage your own self-esteem and make you insecure about things about yourself. Stop looking at their Facebook, don't think about them and remember that their ex is out of the picture now.</span></div> <div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: Avenir; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; min-height: 25px; text-align: left;"> <span style="font-kerning: none;"></span><br /></div> <div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "Avenir Next Condensed"; font-size: 38px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; text-align: left;"> <span style="font-kerning: none;"><b>2. You're Bringing Doubt Into The Relationship </b></span></div> <div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: Avenir; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; min-height: 25px; text-align: left;"> <span style="font-kerning: none;"></span><br /></div> <div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: Avenir; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; text-align: left;"> <span style="font-kerning: none;">If you compare yourself to his ex and feel insecure in doing so, you'll start to think you're boyfriend is crazy for being with you and not them. You might begin to doubt that he's definitely over her or maybe you think that he still has feelings for her, because you feel like you're not as good as her in some way. </span><br /> <span style="font-kerning: none;"><br /></span> <span style="font-kerning: none;">By comparing yourself to an ex, you're only filling your head with doubt and making things hard in the relationship for yourself. </span></div> <div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: Avenir; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; min-height: 25px; text-align: left;"> <span style="font-kerning: none;"></span><br /></div> <div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "Avenir Next Condensed"; font-size: 38px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; text-align: left;"> <span style="font-kerning: none;"><b>3. Comparing Yourself To Other People In General Is a Bad Idea</b></span></div> <div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: Avenir; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; min-height: 25px; text-align: left;"> <span style="font-kerning: none;"></span><br /></div> <div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: Avenir; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; text-align: left;"> <span style="font-kerning: none;"><b>One of the worst traits to have is self-comparison.</b> It's so easily done but comparing yourself to others only leads to feeling worse about yourself and feeling like you aren't enough or you haven't accomplished enough. </span>You should never compare yourself to others because it distracts you from working on yourself and can demotivate you if you think someone is more successful or superior to you in some way. This is is them same in relationships and it's very unhealthy to compare yourself to an ex-grifleind who was once in your boyfriend's life.</div> <div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: Avenir; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; min-height: 25px; text-align: left;"> <span style="font-kerning: none;"></span><br /></div> <div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "Avenir Next Condensed"; font-size: 38px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; text-align: left;"> <span style="font-kerning: none;"><b>4. You're Making Yourself Paranoid</b></span></div> <div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: Avenir; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; min-height: 25px; text-align: left;"> <span style="font-kerning: none;"></span><br /></div> <div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: Avenir; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; text-align: left;"> <span style="font-kerning: none;">By comparing yourself to his ex, you're only going to make yourself paranoid that you're not as good as her in some way. You'll start to wonder if she was funnier than you, if he was happier with her, maybe he still misses her or wonder if they had a better connection. </span><br /> <span style="font-kerning: none;"><br /></span> <span style="font-kerning: none;">Remind yourself that their relationship didn't work out and <b>they broke up for a reason.</b> He's chosen <i>you</i> now and that's what you should focus on.</span></div> <div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: Avenir; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; text-align: left;"> <span style="font-kerning: none;"><br /></span></div> <div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: Avenir; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; text-align: left;"> <span style="color: #e06666; font-kerning: none;"><span style="color: #e06666;"><a href="https://justandmyguys.blogspot.com//search?q=15-signs-you-need-to-end-your-relationship"><span style="color: #e06666;">Read Next: Signs You Need To End Your Relationship</span></a></span></span><br /> <span style="color: #e06666; font-kerning: none;"><br /></span> <br /> <div class="mailmunch-forms-widget-614785"> </div> <span style="color: #e06666; font-kerning: none;"><br /></span></div> <div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: Avenir; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; min-height: 25px; text-align: left;"> <b style="font-family: "avenir next condensed"; font-size: 38px;">5. It Will Negatively Affect Your Relationship </b><span style="font-kerning: none;"></span></div> <div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: Avenir; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; min-height: 25px; text-align: left;"> <span style="font-kerning: none;"></span><br /></div> <div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: Avenir; font-size: 19px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal;"> </div> <div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: Avenir; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; text-align: left;"> <span style="font-kerning: none;">If you keep stalking their ex on facebook and can't get the thought of them out of your head, you'll start to behave negatively around your boyfriend in your relationship and trust issues may start to develop. You'll become more concerned about his past relationship than your own. </span><br /> <span style="font-kerning: none;"><br /></span> <span style="font-kerning: none;"><b>Don't torture yourself by comparing yourself to his past.</b> You'll end up becoming distant in your relationship which may affect your own feelings towards your boyfriend.</span><br /> <span style="font-kerning: none;"><br /></span> <span style="font-kerning: none;">Focus on yourself and how you feel in your relationship. Enjoy your time with your boyfriend and remember that you're very important to each other and you've chosen to be with each other over everyone else and an ex shouldn't get in the way of that.</span><br /> <span style="font-kerning: none;"><br /></span> <span style="color: #e06666; font-kerning: none;"><a href="https://justandmyguys.blogspot.com//search?q=15-signs-you-need-to-end-your-relationship"><span style="color: #e06666;">Read: 15 Signs That You Need To End Your Relationship Now</span></a></span><br /> <div style="text-align: center;"> <br /> Pin it for later:</div> <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"> <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgm_XNqNLoL9SNKbvKMvWcgBOPcDjepVjwS5ZE69eCa-2n_Pb_dPZ-j6-_T546R5ybmNOiRmk_Puish6A8Ku8r9lG-AWxm4a7-VgTxozigKmC435CJJ34SBxUNbG1niUrttE5QkPIuaYGc/s1600/how+to+stop+comparing+yourself+to+his+ex.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt=" stop comparing yourself to his ex girlfriend 5 Reasons You Need To Stop Comparing Yourself To His Ex" border="0" data-original-height="1500" data-original-width="735" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgm_XNqNLoL9SNKbvKMvWcgBOPcDjepVjwS5ZE69eCa-2n_Pb_dPZ-j6-_T546R5ybmNOiRmk_Puish6A8Ku8r9lG-AWxm4a7-VgTxozigKmC435CJJ34SBxUNbG1niUrttE5QkPIuaYGc/s1600/how+to+stop+comparing+yourself+to+his+ex.png" title="5 Reasons You Need To Stop Comparing Yourself To His Ex" width="195" /></a></div> </div>

5 Reasons You Need To Stop Comparing Yourself To His Ex

So you're in a new relationship, everything is going well and you want to know a little more about your boyfriends past. Maybe he brin...

Read more »