Six Solutions For Six Common Marriage Problems

<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"> <br /> <div style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; clear: left; color: #666666; float: left; font-family: ff-dagny-web-pro; font-size: 18px; line-height: 28px; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; padding: 0px; text-rendering: optimizelegibility;"> <img src="https://ronernbphilly.files.wordpress.com/2012/06/300_arguing_couple.jpg" /></div> <br /> <div style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #666666; font-family: ff-dagny-web-pro; font-size: 18px; line-height: 28px; margin-bottom: 1.25rem; padding: 0px; text-rendering: optimizelegibility;"> Does your husband think that you’re the bomb?  Do you think your husband is?  Thinking your spouse <em style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: inherit;">is </em>the bomb is just another way of saying, “We’re an awesome team, and we’re in this parenting thing together!” If you’re at that good place in your marriage, great!  If you’re not quite there, iSpecialist Kathy Peel gives 6 Solutions for 6 Common Marriage Problems that can especially help if you think your husband is not stepping up enough at home.</div> <div style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #666666; font-family: ff-dagny-web-pro; font-size: 18px; line-height: 28px; margin-bottom: 1.25rem; padding: 0px; text-rendering: optimizelegibility;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: inherit;">1. Marriage Problem: Your husband doesn’t appreciate what you do at home.</strong></div> <div align="left" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #666666; font-family: ff-dagny-web-pro; font-size: 18px; line-height: 28px; margin-bottom: 1.25rem; padding: 0px; text-rendering: optimizelegibility;"> His standard greeting as he comes in the door and glances around the messy living room is, “So what did you do all day?”  You are irritated because he doesn’t appreciate your hard work at home and in fact expects you to do more to meet his needs.</div> <div align="left" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #666666; font-family: ff-dagny-web-pro; font-size: 18px; line-height: 28px; margin-bottom: 1.25rem; padding: 0px; text-rendering: optimizelegibility;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: inherit;">Solution: </strong>Schedule time to talk with him alone.  Before bringing up your feelings, listen to his.  Tell him your goal is to be a good wife, mother, and family manager.<strong style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: inherit;">  </strong>Talk about how you can work together to make your home run more smoothly.</div> <div align="left" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #666666; font-family: ff-dagny-web-pro; font-size: 18px; line-height: 28px; margin-bottom: 1.25rem; padding: 0px; text-rendering: optimizelegibility;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: inherit;">2. Marriage Problem:  Your Husband spends too little time helping </strong>out with housecleaning, cooking, or caring for your children.</div> <div align="left" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #666666; font-family: ff-dagny-web-pro; font-size: 18px; line-height: 28px; margin-bottom: 1.25rem; padding: 0px; text-rendering: optimizelegibility;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: inherit;">Solution:  </strong>Take time to discuss your need for help and why he hasn’t done more to assist you.  Perhaps he felt he’d be intruding your territory, so he backed off.  Maybe has tried in the past and your standards were so high he felt frustrated and scolded rather than appreciated for his effort.</div> <div align="left" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #666666; font-family: ff-dagny-web-pro; font-size: 18px; line-height: 28px; margin-bottom: 1.25rem; padding: 0px; text-rendering: optimizelegibility;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: inherit;">3. Marriage Problem: You try to make him feel guilty </strong>for refusing to step up and help around the house.  You’re frustrated by his uncooperative attitude.</div> <div align="left" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #666666; font-family: ff-dagny-web-pro; font-size: 18px; line-height: 28px; margin-bottom: 1.25rem; padding: 0px; text-rendering: optimizelegibility;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: inherit;">Solution:  </strong>Trying to manipulate him using guilt usually worsens the situation.  Instead, thank him any time you catch him helping around the house.  Also, consider that many men like options.  Rather than ordering him to do something, give him a list of chores and ask him to select several to complete.</div> <div align="left" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #666666; font-family: ff-dagny-web-pro; font-size: 18px; line-height: 28px; margin-bottom: 1.25rem; padding: 0px; text-rendering: optimizelegibility;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: inherit;">4. Marriage Problem: He’s oblivious. </strong>While it’s perfectly obvious to you what needs to be done around the house, your husband seems totally oblivious.  You get tired of telling him to do the same things over and over.</div> <div align="left" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #666666; font-family: ff-dagny-web-pro; font-size: 18px; line-height: 28px; margin-bottom: 1.25rem; padding: 0px; text-rendering: optimizelegibility;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: inherit;">Solution: </strong>Besides being gracious and patient, keep in mind that everyone is different, and he actually really might not see what needs to be done.  There are areas in all of our lives where we don’t live up to each other’s expectations.  See solutions 1-3 for ideas on how to approach him.</div> <div align="left" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #666666; font-family: ff-dagny-web-pro; font-size: 18px; line-height: 28px; margin-bottom: 1.25rem; padding: 0px; text-rendering: optimizelegibility;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: inherit;">5. Marriage Problem: You don’t engage. </strong>You’ve come to see your husband as little more than your backup in managing one crisis after another in your household.  You seldom interact unless you’re dealing with a problem.</div> <div align="left" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #666666; font-family: ff-dagny-web-pro; font-size: 18px; line-height: 28px; margin-bottom: 1.25rem; padding: 0px; text-rendering: optimizelegibility;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: inherit;">Solution: </strong>If you find yourself resenting your husband or appreciating him only for the help he offers around the house, be careful. Such an attitude will erode your marriage.  Begin giving to your marriage, whether by a monthly date night or by regularly praying together.</div> <div align="left" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #666666; font-family: ff-dagny-web-pro; font-size: 18px; line-height: 28px; margin-bottom: 1.25rem; padding: 0px; text-rendering: optimizelegibility;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: inherit;">6. Marriage Problem: You’re at a loss.  </strong>You feel like your marriage is in trouble but you don’t know what to do.</div> <div align="left" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #666666; font-family: ff-dagny-web-pro; font-size: 18px; line-height: 28px; margin-bottom: 1.25rem; padding: 0px; text-rendering: optimizelegibility;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: inherit;">Solution:  </strong>Ask your husband if he would be willing to go with you to a counselor.  If he won’t go, you can gain insight by going on your own.</div> </div>

Six Solutions For Six Common Marriage Problems

Does your husband think that you’re the bomb?  Do you think your husband is?  Thinking your spouse  is  the bomb is just another way o...

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Six Tips To Save Your Marriage Fro Break-Up

<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"> <br /> <div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; clear: left; color: #666666; float: left; font-family: Titillium, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: inherit; line-height: 28.7999992370605px; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> <img src="http://jadeafrican.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/08/angry-african-american-couple-400x295.jpg" style="background-color: transparent;" /></div> <br /> <div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; color: #666666; font-family: Titillium, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: inherit; line-height: 28.7999992370605px; margin-bottom: 1em; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> Are you feeling hopeless about your relationship with your partner? Do you want to rescue your marriage and to lead a happy life with your partner? If you are having trouble to maintain a good relationship with your wife, then you need to follow these simple yet effective formula to re-establish a good relationship with your wife that can be extended for longer.</div> <div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; color: #666666; font-family: Titillium, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: inherit; line-height: 28.7999992370605px; margin-bottom: 1em; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit; font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: 600; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">1. Change Yourself</span></div> <div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; color: #666666; font-family: Titillium, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: inherit; line-height: 28.7999992370605px; margin-bottom: 1em; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> If your attempts to change your partner’s behavior have not gone well so far, then it is time that you changed yourself.<br />• It would be better off for you to figure out what you could do to stay loving and good humored with your wife.<br />• You need to let go your ego and behave the way she wants you to. This is one of the easy ways for resurrecting your marriage.</div> <div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; color: #666666; font-family: Titillium, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: inherit; line-height: 28.7999992370605px; margin-bottom: 1em; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit; font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: 600; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">2. Take Decisions Jointly</span></div> <div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; color: #666666; font-family: Titillium, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: inherit; line-height: 28.7999992370605px; margin-bottom: 1em; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> It is better you adopt a policy to reach solutions to problems jointly. If any one of you takes an upper hand in solving the problem, then the other’s ego will be hurt. By jointly discussing a dilema and coming out with a good solution will help you to put away all your differences with your partner.</div> <div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; color: #666666; font-family: Titillium, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: inherit; line-height: 28.7999992370605px; margin-bottom: 1em; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit; font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: 600; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">3. Spend More Time With Your Partner</span></div> <div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; color: #666666; font-family: Titillium, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: inherit; line-height: 28.7999992370605px; margin-bottom: 1em; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> One of the easy ways to recreate those happy moments of marriage once again is to spend quality time with your partner.<br />• There is no harm in smiling, hugging, caressing, being appreciative as well as having more sex with your partner.<br />• The feeling that you care for her and her feelings will drive her to be more loving and passionate to you.<br />• Helping her out in her jobs, agreeing more and praising her at every right opportunity is sure to increase her love towards you.</div> <div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; color: #666666; font-family: Titillium, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: inherit; line-height: 28.7999992370605px; margin-bottom: 1em; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit; font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: 600; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">4. Do Away With Negativity</span></div> <div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; color: #666666; font-family: Titillium, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: inherit; line-height: 28.7999992370605px; margin-bottom: 1em; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> If you would like to lead a peaceful and taint free relationship, then it is important for you to throw all the negativity out of the window. All sorts of criticisms, accusations, blames, digs, bad remarks, anger and sarcasms will only take your relationship from bad to worse. If you want to survive in a relationship, then you must make sure that the ratio of good to bad interactions is five to one. Aim higher for extending your relationship life long.</div> <div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; color: #666666; font-family: Titillium, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: inherit; line-height: 28.7999992370605px; margin-bottom: 1em; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit; font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: 600; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">5. Never Fall For Relationship Destroying Habits</span></div> <div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; color: #666666; font-family: Titillium, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: inherit; line-height: 28.7999992370605px; margin-bottom: 1em; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> If you are a person who is having an extramarital affair, having drug addictions or is an excessively angry person, then you are not going to sustain your marriage. It is better to get help and to get out of these habits and to lead a happy life with your spouse.</div> <div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; color: #666666; font-family: Titillium, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: inherit; line-height: 28.7999992370605px; margin-bottom: 1em; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit; font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: 600; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">6. Learn The Skills Of Happy Marriage</span></div> <div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; color: #666666; font-family: Titillium, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18px; font-stretch: inherit; line-height: 28.7999992370605px; margin-bottom: 1em; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> No one can be a perfect husband or a wife. But, you can reach near perfection by going through a lot of marriage and relationship books as well attend marriage education courses to learn certain skills to develop a healthy partnership with your spouse. You will be able to not just save your marriage, but will also make it to be a highly successful one.</div> </div>

Six Tips To Save Your Marriage Fro Break-Up

Are you feeling hopeless about your relationship with your partner? Do you want to rescue your marriage and to lead a happy life with ...

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Eight Expectations For A Great Marriage.

<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"> <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"> <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiXyA_2bloFtb_OmumbXKZ0MHxVy2fryOnrTgETxDunFvisXnSLgSXB3dhlMpbi76XvQqKrBR5WrAYUA27DM4EX1HGFYyMD1VTrjSKk65YQDgMJFHg0NNuY40hLcA4KChVZuexU527GsVg/s1600/Untitled-1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="289" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiXyA_2bloFtb_OmumbXKZ0MHxVy2fryOnrTgETxDunFvisXnSLgSXB3dhlMpbi76XvQqKrBR5WrAYUA27DM4EX1HGFYyMD1VTrjSKk65YQDgMJFHg0NNuY40hLcA4KChVZuexU527GsVg/s1600/Untitled-1.jpg" width="320" /></a></div> <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"> <br /></div> <div style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #666666; font-family: ff-dagny-web-pro; font-size: 18px; line-height: 28px; margin-bottom: 1.25rem; padding: 0px; text-rendering: optimizelegibility;"> When you walked down the aisle, what were your hopes, dreams and wishes about your husband and your life together?  Did you look at other marriages that were struggling and think, “<em style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: inherit;">We’ll</em> be different.  That will never happen to us.”  That is how most of us go into marriage, but when our expectations are not met, we need to alter them or we’ll become bitter.</div> <div style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #666666; font-family: ff-dagny-web-pro; font-size: 18px; line-height: 28px; margin-bottom: 1.25rem; padding: 0px; text-rendering: optimizelegibility;"> Shift your thinking by first getting rid of these 3 Beliefs that can Lead to a Dead End Marriage.   Then leave your old assumptions about marriage at the altar and pick up these 8 expectations for a great marriage. <strong style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: inherit;"><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /></strong></div> <div style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #666666; font-family: ff-dagny-web-pro; font-size: 18px; line-height: 28px; margin-bottom: 1.25rem; padding: 0px; text-rendering: optimizelegibility;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: inherit;">1. Expect Conflict. </strong>Conflict will happen, and that’s okay, <em style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: inherit;">if </em>you handle conflict in a loving, mature way.</div> <div style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #666666; font-family: ff-dagny-web-pro; font-size: 18px; line-height: 28px; margin-bottom: 1.25rem; padding: 0px; text-rendering: optimizelegibility;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: inherit;">2. Expect Delays. </strong>Planning for your future is a great thing to do as a couple, just understand that things don’t arrive on schedule – not babies, not raises, not the sitter!</div> <div style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #666666; font-family: ff-dagny-web-pro; font-size: 18px; line-height: 28px; margin-bottom: 1.25rem; padding: 0px; text-rendering: optimizelegibility;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: inherit;">3. Expect Disappointments.</strong> File this in the, “you’re both only human” category.  Your husband will not be the answer to all of your problems.  He won’t be a mind reader or anticipate all of your needs. <strong style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: inherit;">Be prepared to forgive</strong>.</div> <div style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #666666; font-family: ff-dagny-web-pro; font-size: 18px; line-height: 28px; margin-bottom: 1.25rem; padding: 0px; text-rendering: optimizelegibility;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: inherit;">4. Expect to be annoyed.</strong> Be ready for that habit of his you found so adorable while you were dating, to become annoying.  But remember this, there are things you’re doing that are likely annoying him too.  Cut him some slack and continually focus on his good qualities.  If you just can’t overlook what’s bothering you, talk to him about it in a loving, kind way.</div> <div style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #666666; font-family: ff-dagny-web-pro; font-size: 18px; line-height: 28px; margin-bottom: 1.25rem; padding: 0px; text-rendering: optimizelegibility;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: inherit;">5. Expect to think you’re doing more.</strong> You might feel like you’re doing more dishes, more laundry, more bedtime reading with the kids, more taking the garbage out, you get the idea.   When you start feeling put out and put upon, take some time to assess the situation.   Then, instead of attacking your husband and demanding more help, sit down and calmly express your desire to do your jobs well, and ask for his help.  (This “taking care of the house” worksheet can also help figure out who’s best at doing what.)</div> <div style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #666666; font-family: ff-dagny-web-pro; font-size: 18px; line-height: 28px; margin-bottom: 1.25rem; padding: 0px; text-rendering: optimizelegibility;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: inherit;">6. Expect to disagree with some of his decisions.</strong>  Just because you are “one” in marriage, doesn’t mean you will agree on everything.  And, guess what?  That’s okay.  Respect his right to have a different opinion than you.  Don’t shoot down his ideas automatically.  There is more than one way to get the job done.</div> <div style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #666666; font-family: ff-dagny-web-pro; font-size: 18px; line-height: 28px; margin-bottom: 1.25rem; padding: 0px; text-rendering: optimizelegibility;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: inherit;">7. Expect not to be attracted to him.</strong> This may never happen to you.  You might go through your entire marriage  with the hots for your husband.  But if at some point you’re just not that into him, pray that you will have a loving heart.  Also, look beyond the physical or lack of chemistry and fall in love with what’s good about your husband.</div> <div style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #666666; font-family: ff-dagny-web-pro; font-size: 18px; line-height: 28px; margin-bottom: 1.25rem; padding: 0px; text-rendering: optimizelegibility;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: inherit;">8. Expect to be with him until the end. </strong>This is a mental safety net.  Even when you’re furious at him or extremely disappointed, you will not think of leaving.  You can’t, remember?  You’re with him until the end. This expectation also helps you realize that you might as well make your marriage as good as it can be, because you are in it for the long haul.</div> </div>

Eight Expectations For A Great Marriage.

When you walked down the aisle, what were your hopes, dreams and wishes about your husband and your life together?  Did you look at ot...

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Seven Keys To A Happy Wife

<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"> <div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; color: #404040; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 20px; margin-bottom: 1.5em; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> <img src="http://thyblackman.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/blackmaneatingfruit.jpg" /></div> <ol style="background-color: white; border: 0px; color: #404040; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 20px; list-style-image: initial; list-style-position: initial; margin: 0px 0px 20px 3em; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> <li style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><strong style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Separate from Mama.</strong> – Men, you are married to your wife, not your mom! When family matters invade a marriage, your wife needs to trust that you and she are a united front. She must not fear that you will go behind her and talk negatively, especially to your mom. When you and your wife speak to your mom, it should be as one flesh, not competing teams. Your mom is usually going to fight in your corner, right or wrong. This will cause serious problems in your marriage. I love my mom and she is precious to me, but YOU leading your family is the best way to gaji her, not the other way around.</li> <li style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><strong style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Balance the extracurriculars.</strong> – Living life in Sportsman’s Paradise can get busy. Louisiana has everything a man could ever want with regards to the outdoors. My boat and I were closer than my former wife and I at one time. I was perfectly happy leaving her home with the kids to go “tear ‘em up” somewhere in the Lake Pontchartrain waters. The persoalan with this is when it’s done in excess. You really need to take a look at why you fish, hunt, play video games, go to sports bars, etc. Are you doing it because it’s fun or are you getting away from your wife? It’s easy to fall into this trap because it’s easy to justify “harmless” activities. After all, you’re not out drinking all night with other women, so it’s not <em style="border: 0px; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: medium; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">that</em> bad. The persoalan is that your absence at home is felt by your wife and the kids. Keep your extracurricular activities in check by communicating about them with your wife. Too much passing the ball or too much running the ball will make it easy for the defense to game plan against your marriage. You need balance!</li> <li style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><strong style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Kiss <em style="border: 0px; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: medium; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">her</em> first.</strong> – When you see your wife for the first time after a day of work, kiss her first. If you’re coming home from work or a long day out – put your keys down, drop your bag on the floor and lay one on her! There is nothing that makes mamma feel better than knowing you are thinking about her. Hitting the door with the intent to connect with her immediately sets the stage for positive energy throughout the evening and shows the kids that their parents are secure in their relationship.</li> <li style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><strong style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">“Boys Night Out” (AKA: Bachelor Parties).</strong> – I mean – C’mon man! There is nothing that kills a good thing with your wife like a “boys night out”. Back in the day, I was a partying force to reckon with. “Boys night out” usually implied alcohol, taxi cabs, strip clubs and vomit. If this is how you roll with the boys, then I suggest you re-examine your priorities. You may not know it, but your wife is probably scared to death the whole time you’re out. If you want to go hang out with your friends, don’t involve excessive booze at nightclubs. Take some responsibility as a husband and make sure your wife approves. A good question to ask yourself is, “If my wife were here, would she be offended?” (This tip goes for the ladies too.)</li> <li style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><strong style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Reject Passivity.</strong> – When something is happening that you know isn’t right, step in. Passivity will kill your family’s faith and trust in you in times when circumstances demand your intervention. There were so many times in my first marriage when my passivity ended up defining my role in my home. This can’t happen. Now – rejecting passivity does not mean that you need to be a dictator in your home. We are to love our wives as Christ loved the church, not like Ike loved Tina!</li> <li style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><strong style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Your wife did not grow up in your house</strong>. – 6 months after my first marriage began, we were in marriage counseling. I was 100% sure it was all her fault. The counselor listened to each of us plead our cases, and after hearing what I had to say, she got very strong with me in her response. My biggest complaint was “This isn’t the type of environment I grew up with in my house. It’s not the way I do things.” My counselor was quick to point out that my wife did not grow up with me or my family. She was thousands of miles away living a different life and didn’t even know I existed. She said, “How can you possibly expect her to understand ‘how things were in your house’ when you met her only a year ago at the age of 27? And why do you expect her to act like your relatives?” She was right. Far too often we think things will immediately “mesh” and that we’re above the communication problems. Understand that you and your wife are building a <em style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">new</em> life together, and it will always be in progress.</li> <li style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><strong style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Own her decisions.</strong> – I admit, being married to my wife is like a spiritual roller coaster. She is plugged in to Jesus! Her extreme spirituality leads her in places that are sometimes not familiar to me. She respects my role as the head of our family and when issues arise that are major, it’s my job to make the selesai decision. (And ladies – before you get up in arms about the “balance of power”, she will be the first to tell you that she prefers it that way. The burden is taken off of her shoulders by allowing me to bear the responsibility of the heavy family issues.)  Even though many of the ideas are not mine, I am the leader of my house and therefore the decisions to take action are<em style="border: 0px; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: medium; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> all</em> mine. If decisions like these fail, you should never blame your wife. You should own it and learn from it.</li> </ol> </div>

Seven Keys To A Happy Wife

Separate from Mama.  – Men, you are married to your wife, not your mom! When family matters invade a marriage, your wife needs to trust ...

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20 Relationship Tips: Give Your Relationship the Attention it Deserves

<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"> <header class="article-header"><h1 class="entry-title single-title" itemprop="headline"> 20 Relationship Tips: Give Your Relationship the Attention it Deserves</h1> <div class="single-featured-image"> <img alt="" class="attachment-gz-thumb-750 size-gz-thumb-750 wp-post-image" height="426" itemprop="image" sizes="(max-width: 750px) 100vw, 750px" src="https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/Fotolia_40455924_S-750x500.jpg" srcset="https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/Fotolia_40455924_S-750x500.jpg 750w, https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/Fotolia_40455924_S-768x512.jpg 768w, https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/Fotolia_40455924_S-300x200.jpg 300w, https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/Fotolia_40455924_S-350x233.jpg 350w, https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/Fotolia_40455924_S.jpg 849w" width="640" /></div> </header><section class="entry-content clearfix" itemprop="articleBody"><div style="text-align: center;"> <strong>Richard Nicastro, PhD explores specific ways you can improve your relationship, noting that it usually doesn’t just “happen” but requires effort to be sure it gets adequate attention.  </strong></div> Let’s face it: there is a staggering volume of marriage/relationship help advice out there. Any Internet search on the topic will give you page after page of relationship “How to’s” and “What not to do’s.” Depending on your perspective, this can be either good news (the easy availability of helpful information) or bad news (trying to navigate the overwhelming maze of relationship tips).<br /> The truth is, there is also a great deal of overlap in what is being said about how to strengthen a marriage/relationship—and while some authors are more eloquent in how they get this information across than others, often the underlying message is consistent. This is good news. The repetition in marriage/relationship advice suggests that there are important hard-and-fast principles that couples should pay attention to.<br /> So rather than searching for the golden goose that will magically send you down the path of marital or relationship bliss, it’s time to roll up your sleeves and give your relationship the attention it deserves.<br /> <br /> <strong>20 Relationship Tips:</strong><br /> <ol> <li>Couples need to set up a <strong>clear boundary</strong> around their relationship—this boundary involves saying “no” to the influences that can undermine your relationship.</li> <li>Healthy marriages/relationships require <strong>balance</strong> between having shared couple-experiences that will feed the relationship while at the same time nurturing their individual interests and pursuits.</li> <li>Without a clear expression of <strong>commitment</strong> to the relationship, trust and emotional security will suffer. A strong relationship foundation is built on mutual commitment.</li> <li>Direct, <strong>clear communication</strong> should always be a top priority.</li> <li>Being <strong>attuned to your needs</strong>, wants and desires is the first step in getting them met—when you’re unclear about your own needs, how can your spouse/partner ever meet them?</li> <li>Not everything needs to be discussed, analyzed and “processed” between partners. Letting go, <strong>giving your partner the benefit of the doubt</strong>, and practicing forgiveness will go a long way in creating a fulfilling relationship.</li> <li>Words have the power to build empathic bridges between partners, and <strong>words</strong> also have the power to hurt and create a wasteland of distance between you. Choose your words wisely.</li> <li>Important issues that are repeatedly ignored, minimized or go underground will resurface with a vengeance. A healthy relationship requires <strong>facing uncomfortable issues</strong> from time to time.</li> <li>Like a wildfire, emotional wounding and defensiveness can spiral out of control and quickly consume a relationship.  Couples need to be <strong>mindful of the negative cycles</strong> that arise in their relationship.</li> <li>Deliberately <strong>creating positive experiences</strong> and interactions between the two of you (while facing the uncomfortable issues that need to be addressed) should be an ongoing priority.</li> <li>Emotional intimacy and closeness are built upon both partners being consistent, <strong>emotionally available</strong> and responsive to one another.</li> <li>Expecting to get all (or even most) of your needs met whenever you want is like expecting the weather to change based upon your whims and preferences.  Unrealistic <strong>expectations</strong> lead to unhappy marriages/relationships.</li> <li>For some, emotional closeness is a prerequisite for sexual intimacy; for others, sexual intimacy leads to <strong>emotional intimacy</strong>.</li> <li>Passion and <strong>fulfilling sex</strong> often needs to be talked about, planned and negotiated (a lack of sexual spontaneity isn’t necessarily a sign of marital/relationship problems).</li> <li>What makes you feel loved and <strong>emotionally connected</strong> may be very different from what makes your partner feel loved and emotionally close. Communicating and understanding these differences can go a long way in improving your relationship.</li> <li>Certain differences between your and your partner’s <strong>communication styles</strong> and emotional expressiveness need to be accepted. You can’t make an introvert outgoing, and likewise, don’t expect an extrovert to happily sit home every evening.</li> <li>Friendships are built on joint activities and common interests. In addition to being lovers, couples need to <strong>learn to be friends</strong>.</li> <li>Couples who actively practice <strong>gratitude and appreciation</strong> feel a deep sense of connection with one another. It’s too easy to simply focus on what bothers you about your mate while ignoring why you fell in love with him/her in the first place.</li> <li>While a relationship obviously takes two committed people, one person can make a difference in improving the overall <strong>quality of the relationship</strong>.</li> <li>Fulfilling, healthy relationships are co-created, not found. Couples who <strong>work together</strong> (at keeping their relationship strong) are more likely to stay together.</li> </ol> While it can be easy to feel overwhelmed by the information presented in this article, remember that you can pick one or two items from the above list and began implementing them into your relationship right away. As a marriage/couples counselor, I’ve seen couples make big differences in their relationship with a simple and relatively small change—the goal is to be consistent and persistent with whatever positive change you’re trying to make.</section></div>

20 Relationship Tips: Give Your Relationship the Attention it Deserves

20 Relationship Tips: Give Your Relationship the Attention it Deserves Richard Nicastro, PhD explores specific ways you can improve ...

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12 Golden Rule To A Happy And Long Lasting Marriage/Dating

<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"> <img src="http://static.yourtango.com/cdn/farfuture/KAo2PPwFWDG0Fwq7dQMNqrkMNprh4Fmm6mivRRQb9CA/mtime:1427941577/sites/default/files/styles/listing_big/public/image_feature/golden.jpg?itok=xae17eRc" /><br /> <br /> <div class="field-value value-bold summary dek no-label" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; clear: both; font-family: 'Open Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 22.399999618530273px; margin-bottom: 10px;"> <div class="field field-name-field-daily-dish-feature-summar field-type-text-long field-label-above" style="box-sizing: border-box;"> <div class="field-items" style="box-sizing: border-box;"> <div class="field-item even" style="box-sizing: border-box;"> Fairy-tale love is hard to find. Here are some tips for keeping your relationship healthy and happy.</div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="field-value body no-label" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #333333; font-family: 'Open Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 22.399999618530273px; margin-bottom: 10px;"> <div style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 10px;"> One of the most common questions we hear is, "<em style="box-sizing: border-box;">How do we make our relationship work?</em>" The answers are complicated, varied, and after a while, start to sound like muddled platitudes. But these commonplace sayings get repeated because <em style="box-sizing: border-box;">they work</em>. With this in mind, we pulled together 12 cliches that, in fact, reveal simple, tried-and-true advice for having a healthy, happy relationship. Read on and let us know what you think:</div> <div style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 10px;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">1. Mind your manners.</strong> "Please," "thank you" and "you're welcome," can go a long way in helping your partner remember that you respect and love him and don't take him for granted.</div> <div style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 10px;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">2. Variety is the spice of life.</strong> Studies have shown that dullness can lead to dissatisfaction with a relationship. Trying something new can be as simple as visiting an unfamiliar restaurant or as grand as a backpacking trip through Sri Lanka. Discoveries you make together will keep you feeling close. </div> <div style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 10px;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">3. The couple that plays together, stays together.</strong> Find a sport or hobby that you both love (no, watching TV doesn't count) and make it a priority in your relationship. Camping, biking, building model trains. .. whatever it is, find something you enjoy doing together.</div> <div style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 10px;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">4. Fight right.</strong> In order to have productive arguments, keep these rules in mind: Don't call your spouse names. When things get really tough, take a break from the argument. Let the other person finish his/her sentences. Don't initiate a discussion when you're angry.</div> <div style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 10px;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">5. I'll scratch your back if you scratch mine.</strong> No one likes demands (unless you're in a BDSM role play) but everyone can appreciate a compromise. If you want your lover to do something and you're not sure he'll be agreeable, the quickest way to avoid a confrontation is to sweeten the deal. For example: "Sure, I'll watch Monday Night Football if you take me to see the next movie of my choice."</div> <div style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 10px;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">6. Two heads are better than one.</strong> Being in a relationship basically means you've made a merger; you've not only joined assets but inherited the other's problems as well. Rather than looking at his problems as merely his own, tackle them together. For example, if he's gaining weight, rather than pushing him to diet on his own, enroll in an exercise kegiatan together.</div> <div style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 10px;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">7. Distance makes the heart grow fonder.</strong> Maintain your own friendships and occasionally have a night out without your significant other. Doing things without your s.o. not only makes you miss him or her, it also keeps you sane. And in case the relationship doesn't work out, you'll still have your friends.</div> <div style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 10px;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">8. Sound it out.</strong> It other words: communicate! Talking out the tough subjects — money, religion, fidelity, raising kids —will not be the most fun you've had, but it'll be valuable.</div> <div style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 10px;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">9. Laughter is the best medicine.</strong> Learn to laugh at yourself and at silly mistakes. If he throws your $300 cashmere sweater in the dryer, laughing it off is better than getting angry in the long run. It's just a $300 cashmere sweater, not the end of the world.</div> <div style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 10px;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">10. Keep your eyes on the prize. </strong>Yes, he forgot your co-worker's name for the tenth time, but it probably doesn't mean he doesn't care about you. If you keep your perspective fixed on the goal — to be in a happy, functioning partnership — you're less likely to get tangled up in every minor annoyance. Remember, you both want the same thing.</div> <div style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 10px;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">11. Quitters never win.</strong> Find a ritual and keep it alive, no matter what. Whether it's always kissing each other good night, renewing your wedding vows every year, sleeping in as late as you want once a month or committing to having sex once a week, pick something that makes you both feel good and stick to it, even when you're tempted to skip.</div> <div style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 10px;"> <strong style="box-sizing: border-box;">12. When the going gets tough, the tough get going ... to therapy.</strong> Studies show that couples who seek counseling during rocky periods are more successful in resolving their issues than those who don't. Whether its from a religious figure, counselor or mental health professional, getting an expert to help sort out strife is as wise as forgoing self-installation and hiring a plumber to put in a new sink.</div> </div> </div>

12 Golden Rule To A Happy And Long Lasting Marriage/Dating

Fairy-tale love is hard to find. Here are some tips for keeping your relationship healthy and happy. One of the most common que...

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Time to Rethink What Thought You Knew About Romantic Relationships and Affairs

<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"> <header class="article-header"><h1 class="entry-title single-title" itemprop="headline"> Time to Rethink What Thought You Knew About Romantic Relationships and Affairs</h1> <div class="single-featured-image"> <img alt="" class="attachment-gz-thumb-750 size-gz-thumb-750 wp-post-image" height="426" itemprop="image" sizes="(max-width: 750px) 100vw, 750px" src="https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/04/Fotolia_94618063_S-750x500.jpg" srcset="https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/04/Fotolia_94618063_S-750x500.jpg 750w, https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/04/Fotolia_94618063_S-300x200.jpg 300w, https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/04/Fotolia_94618063_S-768x513.jpg 768w, https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/04/Fotolia_94618063_S-350x234.jpg 350w, https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/04/Fotolia_94618063_S.jpg 848w" width="640" /></div> <div class="social-share-container"> <div style="text-align: left;"> <br /></div> <span class="st_facebook_large" displaytext="Facebook"></span> <span class="st_twitter_large" displaytext="Tweet"></span> <span class="st_pinterest_large" displaytext="Pinterest"></span> <span class="st_linkedin_large" displaytext="LinkedIn"></span> <span class="st_googleplus_large" displaytext="Google +"></span> <span class="st_email_large" displaytext="Email"></span></div> </header><section class="entry-content clearfix" itemprop="articleBody">Esther Perel has an unmistakeable presence.  The Belgian speaker, therapist, author and TedX sweetheart has been challenging us all, including therapists like myself, to rethink our paradigms around romantic relationships and infidelity.<br /> Recently at the Psychotherapy Networker Symposium in DC, I had the opportunity to hear her speak about shifts in romantic relationships and the heart of the matter in modern day affairs.<br /> According to Esther, “expectations put on a romantic relationship are at an all time high” and mirror cultural shifts that have occurred.  There is more ambiguity with roles, social hierarchies and prohibitive religious structures are less intact, there is more freedom for self expression and happiness seeking for the individual is a higher priority.<br /> As we have moved away from community living with families and friends nearby, we have less sense of belonging.  “When we lived in the village we knew everything about the couple; every fight and every fuck,” she said, matter of factly.  As many issues there surely were with such intertwined living, now that the pendulum has swung to the other side and we now face the public health crisis of loneliness.  And couples have become more isolated, often rely on one person, each other, to be their trusted confidante, best friend, best lover and intellectual equal.<br /> <div style="text-align: center;"> <em>“Our modern model for modern marriage is that one person will give us what an entire village used to provide.” </em></div> <div style="text-align: center;"> – Esther Perel</div> This is why the pain around infidelity is different today.  This betrayal can be incredibly traumatic because it threatens the sense of self, challenging the idea that this person was “the one.”  And the digital age of social media, texts and emails can feel like “death by a thousand cuts” to the one who has been betrayed and has discovered messages and other cyber evidence of an affair.<br /> <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"> <a href="https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/04/Fotolia_194581581_XS-300x100.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" border="0" class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-11046" height="100" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" src="https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/04/Fotolia_194581581_XS-300x100.jpg" srcset="https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/04/Fotolia_194581581_XS-300x100.jpg 300w, https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/04/Fotolia_194581581_XS-350x117.jpg 350w, https://loveandlifetoolbox.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/04/Fotolia_194581581_XS.jpg 600w" width="300" /></a></div> <strong>What lies at the heart of an affair?</strong><br /> Esther reports it’s not usually really about the sex.  In her experience, she has found there has been a yearning to bring back some kind of vitality, recapture lost parts, an entitlement to seek out desires or simply be happier than we are.  Some affairs happen after years of monogamy in a relationship where the person never thought they would do such a thing but they feel driven to feel special, important, to beat back a sense of deadness.  And wanting what you can’t have can also be intoxicating.<br /> She touches on the issues that come up around “romantic consumerism,” that we now have thousands of people at our fingertips via dating apps and online sites.  This raises the question, how will you know when you’ve found “the one” with so much choice?<br /> <strong>What can modern couples do differently to preserve their relationships?</strong><br /> <ul> <li>Reconsider the expectations you put on each other.</li> <li>Rely on friends and family for some of your emotional burdens and need for connection.</li> <li>Keep your relationship dynamic fresh with new experiences, breaking up routines and maintaining even a little mystery between each other.</li> <li>Continue to find ways to make each other feel special and prioritized.</li> </ul> Intimate relationships, particularly long term, can inherently run into problems when the couples focus drifts too far away from the living, breathing relationship itself.  Like most plants, it needs attention and water to survive.  Yes, the paradigm around romantic relationships has changed but this doesn’t need to mean they are all destined for failure.  It’s an alert signaling the need for us all to rethink their meaning in the context of the world around us as and maybe most importantly, face and adapt to our societal issue of loneliness head on.<br /> <br /></section></div>

Time to Rethink What Thought You Knew About Romantic Relationships and Affairs

Time to Rethink What Thought You Knew About Romantic Relationships and Affairs Esther Perel has an unmistakeable presence.  T...

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